Guide to the Virtual Girlfriend Experience

I was lucky enough this past week to have an amazing conversation with a fellow flirt from NiteFlirt! My friend, Sara (popularly known as SweetlySensual_Sara on NF), is the gorgeous, sensual voice behind the podcast, “Must Love Fetish.” Yours truly was her special guest this week! Sara interviewed me, and we had a very insightful and thought provoking conversation regarding the virtual girlfriend experience.

must love fetish podcast
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In an effort to expand upon a very fascinating chat between Sara and I, I’m dedicating this post to the elaboration of some of the interesting topics related to being a virtual girlfriend. My suggestion is to first listen to my guest appearance on “Must Love Fetish” if you haven’t done so already! If you decide to read this first, be sure to accompany it with the podcast as a follow up (you can listen for free on iTunes), so you can hear Sara and I speaking about the complexities, intricacies, and addiction that is the virtual girlfriend experience.

As a consumer in adult services, you’ve likely seen the term “girlfriend experience” or “GFE” advertised all over NiteFlirt and other adult forums. Perhaps you’ve been one of the lucky men to partake in a mutually beneficial girlfriend experience? Maybe you’ve been curious but reluctant to seek out a GFE service, not knowing what your expectations might be? Or, perhaps you have no fucking clue what having a virtual girlfriend would even mean? Well, here is your guide to all things “Virtual Girlfriend Experience.”

What is the Virtual Girlfriend Experience?

Very much like the name indicates, having a virtual girlfriend brings all the benefits of a real relationship: conversation, companionship, intimacy, sexual pleasure, and emotional support to name a few. Yet, ideally, having a virtual girlfriend leaves behind the many stresses that tend to arise with a “real life” girlfriend or wife: arguing, jealousy, nagging, control, demands, predictability and monotony.

The concept of the “Girlfriend Experience” arises from the world of escorting;however, a virtual girlfriend provides, essentially, the same experience but without the actual physical contact with that of sleeping with an escort. Yes, it’s still considered a transaction or exchange of goods – the reality is that when we work in the adult business that is at the core of all of our phone sex relationships. There is the provider and there is the client; however, the virtual girlfriend experience truly delivers so much more than an exchange of sexual pleasure for money. Dedicating your hard earned money and time to a virtual girlfriend pays off far more than it costs. If you find the right girl, the benefits are endless, and you will have earned not only a confidant but a true friend who is always in your corner. Your girlfriend experience will include having a woman who is always available to cheer you on during your achievements and successes and who is going to be there for you during obstacles and hardships.

Is the Virtual Girlfriend Experience for You?

A majority of my “virtual boyfriends” are men who are at a point in their lives where they might feel like they are no longer the priority in their real life partner’s world or have found that they are missing out on the most necessary intimate aspects of a relationship. If in your life you often feel lonely, ignored, under appreciated, unimportant, insecure, and in need of someone to talk to, then you are already a great candidate for finding a virtual girlfriend.

GFE isn’t just for the aforementioned men; perhaps you travel a lot or are often too preoccupied with work and friends to give what is necessary to an every day relationship. Maybe you find that you are often selfish in relationships and it’s just sometimes too much trouble to cater to the schedule, wishes, and expectations of women who just don’t understand what it is you need out of a girlfriend. It’s even possible that you’re perfectly happy in your current marriage or relationship, yet need a little spice on the side.

There’s no shame in wanting action and excitement so you can explore your sexuality. There’s also no shame in wanting to, as you continue to grow as a person, meet new people and have new experiences outside of your every day world of family and friends and work and mundane duties. All humans crave both emotional connection and sexual gratification; therefore, the virtual girlfriend experience is a no-strings-attached way to fulfill those desires without actually stepping out on your significant other or compromising your own needs. 

How to Find the Perfect Virtual Girlfriend

On the “Must Love Fetish” virtual girlfriend experience episode, I spoke about how I never set out to offer a girlfriend experience to callers. Becoming a professional “girlfriend” of sorts just happened naturally, because I grew to have genuine care for my callers and made real connections to men who kept wanting to come back for more. Over time, these phone relationships have grown into true connections, real attraction, and a mutually beneficial arrangement.

As a provider of phone sex, I most certainly know that every single man who dials my number is not going to be my “ideal” man. Sometimes the reality is that a phone sex call just doesn’t deliver the chemistry or connection or gratification that someone is looking for. Personalities might conflict, fetishes might work in opposition of what I, as a provider, am willing to offer, and any other number of scenarios might occur that make a caller and a phone sex girl NOT be a perfect match for each other. For instance, just like when going on a real date, sometimes you just don’t “click.” In regular phone sex and fantasy role play calls, these issues aren’t usually much of an issue at all. In fact, a caller might not ever even have the indication that our personalities aren’t jiving, because the purpose isn’t to get to know one another, the purpose is to get off. It’s my job to please YOU, the caller. If you’re paying for me to humiliate you because of your small penis or if you’re wanting me to “wallet rape” you or role play as your cum hungry wife, I can do all of these things whether it turns me on or not. You pay for our services; us girls deliver.

The virtual girlfriend experience though, is vastly different. There needs to be a real connection and mutual respect for one another on multiple levels. As much as I am here to cater to you and your needs, you also provide me with a gratifying sexual, emotional, and intimate experience. Being a phone whore can be faked; being a virtual girlfriend takes authenticity, truth, understanding, and most of all RESPECT.  For men browsing sexy listing after sexy listing of women offering a virtual girlfriend experience, it might be hard to determine who the right girl for you is. I’ve found that most of my virtual boyfriends didn’t start off wanting or seeking out a GFE; what happened was that they called me for a more traditional phone sex experience, but we hit it off.

Over time, we both wanted to know more about each other’s personalities and lives. We would discuss everything from our sexual desires to our ideal dates to what our favorite movies and books are or just sharing a funny story about something that happened to us that day.We began to have longer conversations that focus on real life opinions, observations, and experiences rather than just going through the motions of a sexual experience and hanging up the phone. This doesn’t mean, however, that many men don’t set out to find a virtual girlfriend rather than just a smoking hot phone fuck. It just takes a little bit more work on your behalf to find a woman who is going to be genuine with you rather than someone who is just going to play along as though it’s a fantasy. Again, let me be clear – “playing” at being your girlfriend is well within the realm of phone sex services; but, if you truly want to feel a true connection, it means you’ve got to engage in repeated calls and the entire conversation shouldn’t be completely one-sided. Sure, you’re paying for your calls, but as mentioned earlier, for real feelings to develop, you must do your part in sustaining the relationship and staying in the forefront of a woman’s mind.

If you’re testing the waters with finding a virtual girlfriend experience, you should be looking for a woman on the other end of the phone who is giving you her undivided attention. She should, over the course of a few phone calls, be able to remember details you’ve told her in the past without it feeling forced or faked. Your virtual girlfriend should follow up on things you’ve talked about in the past, such as travel plans or important events you may have mentioned in a past call. She should ask questions about your life, while also sharing experiences of her own. Your new virtual girlfriend should be able to laugh with you, talk with you about your interests (though she doesn’t need to be an expert in them), and know when it’s time to turn up the heat. When you’ve found a woman you look forward to talking to, someone you think about throughout the day and want to share thoughts, feelings, and just something that made you think of her with, then you’re making that transition from role playing to a developing a connection to a virtual girlfriend.

All of this sounds like a real relationship, right? So, what’s the benefit of having a virtual girlfriend rather than going out and finding a “real life” girlfriend to deliver these essential benefits or fill a void in your life? Well, the obvious is that on the phone you are less vulnerable because there is a level of distance that doesn’t call for traditional expectations like monogamy. You don’t need to rely on your physical appearance being what leads a woman to be interested; it’s your intelligence, personality, and who you are at your core that your virtual girlfriend will become attracted to.

A virtual girlfriend isn’t bringing you baggage or demanding expectations beyond what you choose to give her. The stress of a real relationship doesn’t and shouldn’t seep into your virtual world of happiness, companionship, and intimacy. A virtual girlfriend won’t make unreasonable demands for your time, she won’t stop you from hanging out with your friends, she won’t get jealous because you talked to some other woman, and she won’t make you feel stupid, insecure, or not good enough. You can get all those things from a real life girlfriend or wife, and your virtual girlfriend knows this!

Sex with a connection and deep intimacy is fucking incredible and above and beyond what any traditional phone sex call can provide. Getting off is great, obviously, but getting off with someone with whom you’ve built and established a mutually caring and genuine admiration and connection with can surpass some of the real life sex you’ve ever had. This isn’t to say, however, that journeying into the world of virtual relationships doesn’t allow room for real life situations to occur. It just means that for many men out there, finding a virtual girlfriend experience can fill any emptiness you’ve found to exist in your life. Us flirts are here to save you from a boring, predictable, lonely, and love-less life. Finding the right virtual girlfriend for you can make all the difference in your happiness. 

The Complexities of Providing the Virtual Girlfriend Experience

As the girl offering a girlfriend experience, the experience itself can be complex and emotional. When we’re providing phone sex, us flirts are well aware that the goal is to get you off. We know that once you cum, the call usually ends, and if we’re lucky enough to make it to your “favorites” we’ll hear from you again in a few days or weeks and have a hot phone fuck session all over again. However, when offering girlfriend experience, we open up to our callers (or “virtual boyfriends” as I like to say) on a much deeper level. These men see us as more than just a sultry and sweet voice with a dirty vocabulary on the other end of the line. You will see us as the real people we are. Us GFE flirts share true and meaningful experiences with you, and show ourselves to you on an intimate level that very few of our callers are lucky enough to ever see. It can be difficult for both parties to establish and maintain boundaries when this level of intimacy is involved.

During the “Must Love Fetish” podcast, Sara asks me if I’ve ever fallen in love with a caller. She also shares her own personal story of falling for a previous client of hers. Our conversation is authentic and demonstrates some of the insecurities and painful choices that might arise as a phone sex provider who has found herself with feelings for a man who in any other world is just a distant stranger on the other end of the line.

Us virtual girlfriends are not immune to truly falling for you. It’d be very difficult to speak to someone on the phone for hours at a time, sometimes several days a week and keep up a facade regarding who we are and how we feel. We are capable of falling in love with you, capable of having our hearts broken by you, and capable of insecurities that people tend to experience in real life relationships. As a result, we might build walls and create boundaries that, to you – the man paying for our services in the virtual girlfriend experience – don’t fully understand. We have reasons for not giving you our real phone numbers or meeting up for coffee or a fun weekend away, despite how much we want to go. We might hesitate in telling you we love you back after you’ve professed your feelings; not because we don’t feel it, but because of our own lack of “control” over the situation. Romantic feelings are a fragile thing and us girls would often prefer not to break down the virtual wall; this is often out of the need to protect ourselves, as well as you, from the pitfalls that can doom real relationships.

Need to Know More About Virtual Relationships?

To learn more about how I answer that “love” question and many more questions posed by Sara during our conversation, you’ll have to listen to the podcast in its entirety. I’d love to know my readers’ and callers’ opinions on the virtual girlfriend experience. Please leave a comment with your personal GFE history, curiosities, questions, and thoughts!

Finally, if you’re in search of something that feels like it’s been missing from your life that traditional phone sex calls haven’t been able to provide, next time you call your favorite flirt maybe frame your call differently; get to know her on a deeper level; ask questions or share stories and observations like you would on a real life date. Then, see if the two of you hit it off… you just might be lucky enough to be one of the men who find a truly one of a kind relationship with that flirt. This connection can bring your sex life to new levels of excitement. Thoughts of your times spent with your virtual girlfriend will make you wake up every single day feeling more alive, knowing that there is a woman out there who unconditionally has your back and your best interest in mind. For us flirts who offer a virtual girlfriend experience, we’ll be by the phone hoping that when the phone rings it’s you – the favorite caller, the man who gets us off every single time, the virtual boyfriend who is also giving us what we are missing in our own lives.  

virtual girlfriend experience
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Anal Sex Adventures

Anal sex is in, and to be blunt – most guys want to fuck a girl in her ass at some point in his life!

It’s the hard (pun intended) truth. It can become a pressure between partners when one person definitively wants to try anal sex and one doesn’t even have anal sex on their sexy-time radar. The truth though, is that anal sex and ass play in general can be some of the most intense and enjoyable sexual experiences when done properly.

When it comes to anal sex, some of us girls are success stories with positive first experiences. Other girls, however, have horror stories or fears that make us never want a guy going back there under any circumstance. Some of us lucky ones were converted, only to become addicted to the pleasure of ass play and anal sex, with the hope of introducing it to new partners of our own.

Is Anal Sex “Vanilla” or “Taboo”?

Depending on who you ask, anal sex and ass play can get shockingly different reactions. Of my group of best friends, only two of us girls admit to enjoying anal sex and three have tried it but say it’s not for them. The remaining three of the eight of us have an absolute hell-to-the-no response any time the topic comes up.

I became sexually active at a young age. It was myAnal Sex freshman year in high school when my then boyfriend first mentioned the prospect of anal sex to me. To generations older than my own, the idea of sex at that age, not to mention anal sex, might already be surprising. Yet, those people must remember, my generation is hyper-sexualized. I mean, all teens are obsessed with sex and have raging hormones, regardless of what decade their adolescence took place in. However, my generation is one groomed off of Internet porn and other forms of entertainment that pushes sexual limits. Things that might have been taboo to our parents’ generation has become matter-of-fact or even “vanilla” to us.

Regardless of age or gender, though, sexual fetishes are subjective. What’s the norm and expected sexual play to one person might be deviant and offensive to another. It’s anal sex, though, that is one of those fetishes that falls within the mainstream that is still met with shock and whispers when discussed in social circles.

Anal SexI’ve known girls who claimed to give blow jobs before they ever had their first kiss. I’ve known other girls who had anal sex because they didn’t consider that as giving up their virginity (eye roll). Other girls of course were harassed into it by boyfriends, while some had a very clear “no enter” policy on ass play of any kind. Sex acts like oral sex, vaginal sex, and YES, even anal sex are the norms for most average teens in a world where SnapChat and secret texting apps that our parents don’t know about are the main form of communication among friends and classmates.

Once, during my sophomore year of high school, a boy from one of my classes who might never have had the nerve to speak to me in school had all the courage in the world talking over direct message. Alone in his room one night, he got horny; having seen some pictures I added to Instagram, his self control was tested and he became so confident that he felt the need to text me. He wrote something to the effect of, “I want you to wrap those sexy lips around my cock so bad.” As a young woman, I feel flattered by this compliment, while at the same time questioning the nerve to be so bold to a girl he’d never had a real conversation with in person.

As you can imagine, if propositions like this come from mere acquaintances, when it comes to someone you’re already sexually active with, the limits are tested and pushed constantly. From requests of naughty SnapChats to acting out fantasies your boyfriend or friend saw in a porn the night before, this tends to be how many girls my age come around to trying anal sex for the first time. Just like “regular” sex, once anal sex is practiced within your circle of friends, it becomes more normalized, less taboo, and just another way to switch things up in the bedroom (or in the car or wherever the hell you can get it in before you have to be home for dinner). 

Ease Into Anal Sex with Ass Play

Anal SexFrom early on in my sexual experiences I enjoyed having a guy lick me all over, which includes finding his tongue exploring around my tight little asshole. Feeling a finger press against that spot as I got my pussy licked, would make me quiver all over. Eventually, having that very first finger start to press against that tightness, I was introduced to a world that made my orgasms more intense and my sexual appetite even more exaggerated than it already was. I have amazing memories back to my early sexual experiences when my boyfriend would go down on me literally every single day after school. He’d always in some way explore my perfect little tight asshole, telling me he dreams about the day that I finally let him fuck me there.

Due to his desire to take things to the next level, my boyfriend showed me an anal sex video of a girl hardcore fucked in the ass. In his own misguided youth, he chose a video that was particularly rough and hard and turned me OFF rather than ON to the whole idea of it. I still wanted ass play with his tongue and finger, but gave a strong “no” on anything more. One day he even “accidentally” slipped back there as he was fucking me, and the excruciating pain made me scream and cry and tell him that the whole idea of him, me, and anal sex just isn’t going to happen.

Fast forward a couple of years, after my aforementioned anal-dreaming boyfriend and I broke up. I got into a relationship with a man who was much older than me and very married (oops). He loved my youth, energy, and sexual appetite. I loved his experience, gentleness, and sexually explorative nature. He told me there wasn’t anything he wouldn’t want to do with me, and this naturally opened the topic of anal sex.Anal Sex

He told me he’d done it before, but never with his wife. She never wanted to try it and once she said she didn’t have that interest, anal sex and ass play of any kind was shut down completely. Hearing him talk about his experience of fucking girls in the ass in his past and loving it, but being cut off from ever having the chance to experience that again made me think about my own sexual choices.

I never wanted nor do I ever want to be that woman who says “never.” I knew I didn’t want to go that far with my ex-boyfriend and do anal a couple years prior, but now… I was intrigued. I had this experienced, sexy, mature older man who knew what he was doing. Furthermore, the extent to which he would get hard when we would talk about it would turn me on so fucking much.

So one brave night, I took solace in the distance of not being with him at the time and texted him a selfie of me with my ass up in the air behind me. The accompanying message read, “I want you to fuck me so bad, and I want you to put it in my ass next time.” So the following Friday after school, when my parents thought I was going to my best friend’s house and staying the night, I showed up at the hotel to meet up with him. I was nervous and excited. He came equipped with lube and was already hard, but fully expecting me to tell him to stop as soon as he got started. He took his time with me. He ate me out, warmed my little ass up by licking it and fingering it, and telling me how fucking hot I am and he can’t wait to feel that tight butt wrapped around his cock.

Anal Sex

I’ll never forget the feeling of the head of his cock pressing against my ass for the first time. His cock was so wet, and it took a really long time for him to even be able to fit the head inside of me, which was the most painful part. He was patient, gentle, and sweet. He constantly asked me if I was okay and wanted more. I could only keep expressing a breathy “yes” as he tried to fit it in. Eventually, he got the head in, and started to slowly push in further, never being rough or getting too carried away.

Anal SexIf I could ever give a man advice about turning a girl on to anal sex, it would be to use this patient and gentle approach. The “oops, I slipped” and rough anal sex porn approach of my previous boyfriend got him nowhere with my ass at that time. However, this sensual, slow, and conscientious technique not only turned me on to anal sex, but eventually got me begging for him to fuck me in my ass nearly every time we would hook up after that.

Like most things, this affair came to an end. He’s still with his wife, but it makes me smile every time I think about being able to make his teen anal sex fantasies come true. It makes me smile even more, though, that he turned me on to something that I otherwise would have potentially cut myself off from trying simply because it was, with my ex-boyfriend, the wrong person at the wrong time.

Anal Sex

Guy’s who call me on NiteFlirt for phone sex fun know that I’m an “anything goes” phone-fuck teen who loves it in my mouth, my pussy, and my ass. I like it slow and sensual and I like it hard and wild. Anal sex is always on the menu for my insanely sexy NiteFlirt boyfriends, but when it comes to real life I’ve only given my ass up to one other guy after my first anal sex partner.

The one other person was that ex-boyfriend who turned me off to it in the first place. For a very brief 3-month period, we got back together our last year of high school, and I never told him at the time that I had anal with someone else before him. I did, however, walk him through the slower, more sensual approach and it was amazing. It confirmed, if nothing else, that it wasn’t just a fluke; I’m a fan of anal sex! Things not long after got contentious between my boyfriend and I again. One day, in a cruel moment of too much honesty, I admitted to him that he was NOT the first guy to fuck me in my ass. Part of me took pleasure in this due to some of the ways he had previously treated me. However, there was that little part of me that felt guilty since he and I had so many other “firsts” together throughout our relationship.

I’m still waiting though, for that next guy in REAL LIFE who is going to get my ass. I love anal play and anal sex and can’t wait to meet another partner who goes above and beyond to worship my hot ass, do everything in his power to make it feel good, and who will cum harder than ever when he knows he’s in an elite club of guys I’d ever let slide into my ass and spread me open in such an intimate and exhilarating way. Until then though, where are my anal sex phone sex partners? I am craving a good anal fuck right now!
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Girl on Girl Action

There’s just something about girl-on-girl action that makes men lose their fucking minds. I agree that the image of two sexy girl’s pretty, soft lips locked in a kiss, twirling their cute little tongues around one another is fucking beautiful. When it comes to guys, it is often ranked as one of their ultimate turn-ons. 

So many of my phone sex callers ask me questions about my attraction to women; these are the questions I receive most frequently:sexy fucking girl kiss

“Are you bi-sexual?”
“Do you ever hook up with girls?”
“Have you ever seen your girlfriends naked?”
“Can you tell me about the first time you ever kissed a girl?”
“If you could have sex with any actress, who would it be?”

Let me start by saying that no, I do not consider myself bi-sexual. I truly and whole heartedly believe that women are the most beautiful and exotic creatures on Earth, and I would rather see a woman naked over that of a man, if I’m speaking aesthetically. However, in terms of sexual attraction and who I want to get off and get me off, I’m 100% into guys.

Having said that, I also must confess though, that I have had very strong physical attractions to women.  This might confuse a lot of people who want to label me as “bi.” My feeling is that a sexy female body is a turn on, no question about it. However, just because it’s a visual stimulation for me doesn’t mean I have an overwhelming desire to physically act on that. I mean, if a guy I’m attracted to is in front of me with a hard-on, it’s a natural instinct to want to get on my knees and suck him off or to climb on top of him and ride his cock till we both explode. That animalistic need has to be fed and the only way I can feel satisfied is to have it then and there. When I see a woman, however, it’s a different feeling. If a girl I found to be the ultimate perfection of the female figure was in front of me, legs spread wide open and wet as can be, I wouldn’t have that same instinct to bury my face between her legs and taste her. It’s not that overwhelming craving that I would feel with a man; instead, it’s an appreciation, an admiration, and will likely be a turn on that makes me wet. That doesn’t mean I’m going to dive in and eat the girl out, though.tumblr_mn5ti6pyzf1qfw572o1_500

As a young woman I’ve experienced first-hand over and over again the overwhelming intrigue shown by guys if you even tease them a little bit about doing something sexual with another girl. I know there’s a joke among generations older than mine about women going through a “phase” in college where they make out with and hook up with their girlfriends. For my generation of millennials, it’s much less a “phase” and far more something you learn very quickly throughout middle school and high school as a tactic to get the attention of boys.There are some things us young girls do with our friends in private when we’re growing up that boys never get to see. However, we tend to exaggerate some of our intimate practices and go public with our displays of female affection as soon as a cute boy at a party suggests it would be hot to see two girls kiss. Whether we’re into our friends or not, if we’re a couple drinks deep, everyone is having fun, and we’re living on the high of being the center of attention, kissing our friends is a really fucking easy way to turn heads.

I can remember as far back as late elementary school at sleepovers with friends. Late at night, we’d all talk about what it will be like to kiss a boy. I mean, some of us already had what we considered a “first kiss.” Maybe a peck stolen on the playground or a kid in the neighborhood who would run around and tease us, only to one day plant one on us. Yet, we all, even at that young age, knew that a REAL first kiss was around the corner, so in our adorable little pajamas, in our sleeping bags, we would hsexy socks - girl-on-girlave little “practice sessions.” We’d put our hands into fists, and kiss the fleshy part of our skin, critiquing one another on technique, as though any of us at that time had any idea what we were talking about.A couple of times some of the braver girls might dare one of us to kiss each other;this would usually end up being a little charade where one would pretend to be the “boy” and the other would be the “girl about to be kissed.” It usually resulted in laughing, teasing each other about our little schoolgirl crushes, and going to sleep still really confused and anxious about whether or not boys would want to kiss us and if we’d be any good at it. Little did we know about the storm of attention we would be getting within a few short years, and that those little “practice” sessions could be reenacted in our teen years with a level of comfort and ease with one another that is unique to girls who share moments like these with their friends.

So, to answer some more of my FAQ’s, I wouldn’t label what I’ve done throughout the last few years as “hooking up” with girls. Have I seen many of my girlfriends naked? Yes. Have I kissed or made out with a few of them? Uh huh. Have I been in the same room with any of my girlfriends when they were naked and getting fucked? Ummm… yes, actually I have! haha. Was I an active participant in that particular activity? Nope! I had my own situation going on in a separate bed, with a separate guy. But, like I said earlier, there is something very visually stimulating about the female body, even when it’s one of your hot friends with whom you basically grew up as sisters.  While I have kissed my best friend (and other friends) in party moments to tease boys, while we regularly get dressed and undressed in front of one another without hesitation, and while I have even seen her in the aforementioned position of getting it on (and she can say the same about me), I still can without any hesitation whatsoever tell you that I have ZERO interest in going down on her, spreading her apart, or putting anything inside her.

I find the fascination and interest a lot of men have with girls making out and lesbian porn to becurious. I always wonder what, beyond the physical attraction, makes this such a popular porn niche when there are alternative options of seeing hot girls go crazy on some guy’s cock. I personally reallylike watching porn from time to time. I started watching it online at a relatively young age and learned kissesso much about sex from dirty videos. In fact, even as a straight girl, I almost always look for a super hot woman in a porn clip before I even care about the content or her “co-star.” I love one-on-one male/female fucking, I like a little variety from time to time, so 3-some videos are super hot and depending on my mood or what catches my eye I can go for  either 2 guys/1 girl or 2 girls/1 guy. So, as you can see, I obviously GET what’s such a turn on about women…. I GET that it’s hot to watch girls do nasty sexual things to each other in a 3-some setting while some guy is fucking them, switching back and forth between the two.

I’m really interested to know, however, what guys tend to love about full out lesbian girl-on-girl fingering, fucking, and pussy eating? Is it the fact that you don’t see another guy in the equation, therefore you can imagine yourself to have them all to yourself? Is it the voyeuristic nature of catching girls being naughty, doing something they wouldn’t want you to see them doing? It is just a simple as jerk-off material where you don’t have to worry about seeing some guys dick and you can focus solely on the female body?

I’d love to hear any thoughts or insight into what you (if this is your thing, that is) find particularly sexy about 2 (or more) women going crazy on one another. Personally, I’ve never even watched a lesbian porn video, so if there’s a particular one that is your favorite that you think could convince even the most cock-hungry girl to give up the dick for a minute and play with myself while watching 2 girls fuck, send it my way! Maybe you’ll open my eyes to something new or maybe I’ll just be extra ravenous for your hard, thick dick, ready for  you to give me a call and take me like only a fucking man can.

bikehotties

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Our Secret Truths

24d6c0ba3da59d59628c51e1e448a98aI recently saw a very powerful and memorable film, the Oscar nominated, The Danish Girl, starring Eddie Redmayne and Alicia Vikander (my most recent Hollywood girl-crush; more on that another time! hehe). Possibly because I am always so wrapped up in thinking about my work on NiteFlirt, I couldn’t help but be struck by some of the parallels in this film and what I experience working in phone sex! So many of us tend to have sides of ourselves that are hidden from the people who think they know us best: whether it’s our friends, family, or significant others, there are some deeply hidden secrets that are kept from these people for one reason or another. 

the-danish-girl-poster-wideFor those of you who may not know, the movie I am referring to is the true story of a successful artist as he, with the support of his wife, transitions into becoming a woman. The film follows the intimate psychological, physical, and sexual tensions that arose for one of the first people to ever undergo sexual reassignment transition and surgery. To be clear, this is not a post on transgenderism specifically, nor is it in any way something anyone reading this needs to understand or even agree with. I bring it up because there is one scene in the film that very strongly resonated with me that made me look at my own work on NiteFlirt and in phone sex and the lives of so many of us out there who are harboring some kind of secret, be it a fetish or a lifestyle preference.  

DanishGirlIn The Danish Girl, there is a scene where the artist reaches out to non other than a sex worker to truly guide him in his search for feminization. He visits a peep show, where he sits behind a glass that separates him from the beautiful dancer who strips before him. Performing what was a regular nightly routine that she at first appears detached from, the dancer quickly realizes that the man watching her behind the glass is NOT there to get off, but instead sitting there imitating her movements. In a sort of beautiful, personal, and honest moment between the two, the dancer slows down her movements to become instructional rather than for the erotic purpose of turning him on, as she’s so often used to. She demonstrates for this man, who is embarking on a journey to become a woman, the ways to move his body, his hands, bat his eyes, and explore his body in the way a woman might. It’s the first time in the film that he truly seems to feel comfortable in his own skin, despite the efforts of his wife and friends to guide him and understand him, it took a woman in the sex industry to recognize this need for guidance, for an outlet, and for a sincere moment in which he could truly feel his true self, shame-free. 

I love this scene because in that moment you can see that the woman understands that she is one of the few people and places that this man in need can turn to in order to explore his true self. 

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In connection to my NiteFlirt gig, while I do get calls from time to time of men who want to experience feminization, the impact reaches far beyond that. From guys who simply want to explore a particular fetish that may be otherwise “taboo” in real like, to people looking to play out outrageous fantasies they might never dream to act on in their day-to-day interactions. From feeling a departure from one’s usual role in life as a dominant or a submissive, to using language that would get them fired or shunned from their social groups, to simply exploring sexuality and engaging in acts with a parter who is not judgmental nor uninterested. I find every single day that men call me and are able to, even if in some small way, become their true selves or their secret selves or their forbidden selves even if just for a few minutes on the phone. 

dom1I adore that when it comes to phone sex, a stranger is reaching out to me and is uninhibited in the way that he can behave. I’d be lying if I said I was never weary or confused about particular fetishes; I’ve even myself been known to block a guy or two who took things to a dark enough place that I became disturbed and wouldn’t want to go to again (though this happens VERY rarely!) However, overall, on a daily basis, I speak to and meet amazing people who live completely normal, average lives. They just know that there is a side to their personality that has been or is being repressed and they need an outlet for it. I love being that outlet. I love knowing that I can carry their secrets with me if it brings them even a little bit of comfort. I love knowing that, at times, I experience a side of my callers that their closest friends or family might never see. With me, a man can be his true self. Whether it’s due to a sexual deviance or it’s because he needs a person to turn to or a shoulder to cry on or another human being to vent to, I believe that phone sex work is oftentimes SO MUCH MORE than just jerking off and cumming hard.

That isn’t to say that it’s not about jerking off. I mean, c’mon…. I’m not fooling myself into thinking I’m doing some incredible work I should be winning a Nobel Prize for. I just feel that whether it’s a 5-minute stroke session to blow off steam from a long day, or it’s a 15-minute conversation about a fetish that a guy has secretly fantasized about for years but hasn’t been able to bring himself to actually admit to a partner, or it’s a 2-hour marathon call as a result of simply feeling lonely, I really think that making a positive connection between phone sex operator and caller is important to each persons’ experience in understanding themselves.

5317b3bed4529209b4ea69674291a441The best part of all of this for me though, is that several of my callers have been this same outlet for ME. A lot of my life, even though I appear to be “in the middle of the action” as a pretty, popular, and outgoing young girl, I’ve actually always felt that I wasn’t being true to myself in many ways. From dealings with friends, family, and relationships, there have been many times I’ve felt the need to hide aspects of myself for fear of shame, particularly when it comes to sexuality or so-called “deviant” or off-beat desires. However, on NiteFlirt, so many amazing guys have brought that out of me, and I’ve been able to explore those desires that I otherwise wouldn’t have without the help of of the creative, sexy, and extra naughty minds of my callers. 

So yes, I am here to fuck you, suck you, tease you, and tempt you. However, I am also here to give advice, to allow you to explore your needs and desires, to talk you through heartache and hardships, and to empower you in a way that will make you feel alive like never before. 
Call RyderDoll for phone sex on Niteflirt.com

Talk Dirty to Me

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It’s no secret that sexual stimulation tends to lower inhibitions, resulting in the animalistic behaviors we all know and love. I for one have been known to say things during sex (and phone sex!) that I would never have predicted would come out of my mouth if I had considered it in a different circumstance. It’s amazing how sexy some words and phrases can be, and when communicated in that particular moment of ecstasy, something that I normally might not consider to be that hot can end up being the hottest fucking thing I’ve ever heard if it’s said at the right place and time while fucking. RyderDoll-solo

Unlike so many of my friends who dreamed of losing their virginity in some sweet way, I was always the one who just wanted to get rid of it and get to the point where I’d be having fun, talking dirty, and getting fucked hard. That being said, I’ve always been a dirty-talker, and in my opinion, a positive side effect of this has been allowing my sexual partners to know exactly what feels good to me and what I want and like, which apparently isn’t always all that common with teenage girls when they begin having sex and exploring their bodies. This isn’t to say that I’m one of those annoying girls who you just want to tell to shut-the-fuck up; I’m just a vocal girl! I like to say nasty things, communicate my desires, and have been known to get loud from time to time, as I’m sure my roommates or anyone else in nearby rooms could probably tell you! 

The topic of dirty-talk came up with some of my friends recently, and our opinions were all over the place in terms of where we stand. Some of my friends were right there with me when it comes to dirty talk, agreeing there are so many ways words can turn sex into an unforgettable adventure. Some of my friends like being called names like a “slut” or to beg a guy for his cock in a certain way (“bend me over and fuck my pussy hard!”). I was surprised that one of my girlfriends says she calls her boyfriend “daddy” sometimes, cause it determines a sexy role of him being older, distinguished, and dominant and plays up her youthful innocence and submissive nature. In contrast, I had friends, who argued that it made them feel uncomfortable or degraded to be called names and that feeding guys’ egos by giving into the stereotype of a “daddy” figure who controls them wasn’t really something that got them off.

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One of my best friends who is a super sexy, outgoing and fun-loving, HOT girl said that she doesn’t like dirty talk at all. Not because she finds it degrading, but she just doesn’t get into talking to her sexual partners during sex, and finds that it’s a distraction for her when the guy is excessive in the things he is moved to say in the moment. Another one of my girlfriends prefers sensual and complimentary words to be exchanged, but nothing that makes her feel too slutty. For instance, she said she’d love to be told she’s beautiful and have her body complimented (who doesn’t!?) but that to be called a name or be too descriptive in a “dirty” way just doesn’t do it for her.

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I for one cannot imagine having quiet sex. Nothing seems as uneventful as taking what is the most amazing physical feeling without having my psyche stimulated at the same time. I love creativity, I love imagination, and I love getting lost in the moment; I believe that “dirty talk” is something that brings out passion that is rarely duplicated when things become hushed. While I would never be okay with being called a “slut” by a guy I’m hooking up with in any setting outside of the bedroom and while I don’t go around inviting guys I meet to shower me with their cum (or whatever other filthy thing that I might say at any given time while caught in crazy passion), it just can’t be denied that when you’re in that intense frenzy of lustful emotions, sometimes things will come out of our mouths that we never could have imagined saying.

beautifulmouthI’ve always known I’ve had a naughty imagination and could verbally bring-it-on when it comes to sex talk, so whether it’s on the phone or in person, I don’t plan to shy away from saying anything that comes into my head in the heat of the moment. One of the great things about hot, racy phone sex sessions is the ability to be ourselves and, whatever we happen to say, we don’t have to have any awkward “pillow talk” discussion or make excuses about it afterwards. There should never be apologies made for those raw, honest, and playful moments between partners, and I’ve been lucky enough to have some very vocal, descriptive, and incredibly creative phone sex partners who have brought my dirty-talk game to a whole new level.

Make sure you check in with me soon on NiteFlirt. I just might surprise you with the crazy things that could slip out of my dirty little mouth. 😉

Call RyderDoll for phone sex on Niteflirt.com

Relationship Status

“Why doesn’t a girl like you have a boyfriend?” 

StatusThis question is, quite possibly, one of the things I am most often asked in my life. Not only by guys on NiteFlirt but from family and even some friends. For some reason, I constantly find myself reminding people of my stats: I’m 19, I’m in college, and my single status isn’t a side effect of something being wrong with me; I don’t have a boyfriend because I don’t WANT one right now. I’m constantly being given unsolicited advice from friends in the “honeymoon” phase of their new relationships, or from aunts who have some romanticized idea of planning my wedding (um, have I mentioned I’m 19? haha) and even from old ladies in coffee shops or supermarkets who feel the need to let me know that they’d make a move on the solo-guy in line in front of us if they were “my age.” 

KissIt might sound like the cliché, “I’m single and loving it!” thing that girls say to keep themselves from crying into their lonely pillow at night, but as a young woman who doesn’t fear for my relationship future, right now I’m all about having fun and not getting too serious. As a college student, I constantly see how my friends tied to relationships struggle with their social decisions, and I do not envy them. The amount of times I’ve been told not to tag a friend on Facebook or Instagram because his or her “significant other” can’t know where they are for the night is astounding. I mean, I can’t image being put in the position to lie about who I’m with and where I am…. well, from anyone other than my mom and dad, maybe. Hehe. 

A lot of people think if you’re not Sexy1that loser girl who is pining after some guy waiting for him to become her boyfriend, that you must be the complete opposite type: the slut who is open for business 24/7 or maybe the anti-love “manhater.” I’m none of the above – I am not promiscuous, but i’m not a prude. I am not searching for and in desperate need of love, but I certainly won’t turn my back on the possibility of someone being a great guy who I’d like to be with, if he so happens to come along. I love having the freedom on any given day to say “no, I’m not interested” or to say “fuck yes, let’s do this!” It’s fucking amazing being a young, attractive, single woman who is aware of her own sexuality, and right now I am owning that! 

I know that because I’m single and have sexual freedom, I can experience things that a boyfriend would hold me back from. While I’m this young, hot, and experimental I want to be uninhibited and crazy sometimes. I want to tease and tempt older married men and make out with college boys whose names I can’t remember. I want to have steamy love affairs, scandalous stories to tell, and impassioned conversations with strangers that make me ache for them for days. 

When I start thinking about the entire concept of monogamy it feels somewhat archaic to me. Maybe it’s because of my unique situation as a “flirt” that I find the idea of a traditional relationship to be potentially disappointing and unrealistic. I mean, I am in constant contact with men who would rather rub one out in the bathroom while talking to me, than have to even for a second interact with his annoying, nagging wife. I know which end of that situation I want to be on, and being the hot young temptress is way sexier than the girlfriend or wife who is in the dark and doesn’t know what her man wants or needs. 

This time spent as a single college girl is and will continue to open my eyes to so many things I otherwise may not know about myself and about men. I know what gets me off and what I’m worthy of. I know that anyone who makes me feel modest, embarrassed, or ashamed in any way about what I like or don’t like isn’t someone who deserves me or my time. Yet I also know that if I’m not willing to be selfless and attend to the needs of a guy, then I can’t expect him to just sit around and patiently wait for me until I am “in the mood.” Sex is incredibly important to a successful relationship, and unless you take the time to explore your own sensuality when you have the freedom to do so, I believe you run the risk of ending up in the type of relationship that is mundane, predictable, or unfulfilling. 

So, as Valentine’s Day weekend approaches and guy friends, ex-boyfriends, and classmates who have apparently been admiring me from afar think they are throwing me a bone by asking me out for a V-Day date, I say, “don’t do me any favors!” This Valentine’s Day I won’t be pretending to like the roses a guy got me instead of the lilies I really wanted or be disappointed by the milk chocolate candies when he knows I only like dark. I won’t be annoyed at the fake attempt to give me some contrived version of a “romantic” date night that, in reality, neither of us actually want to go on. Instead, I’ll be going on a kick ass rock climbing/movie/casual dinner “date” with my other single besties, and I know at the end of the night if I’m feeling in need of something more… I have my own fingers and about a dozen boyfriends on NiteFlirt who know exactly how to take care of me! 

 

Call RyderDoll for phone sex on Niteflirt.com

Are you Taboo?

I have a confession to make…. before I got involved in the “adult” industry, I would have sworn up and down that I knew a fucking lot about sex, sexual desires, and so-called “fetishes.” I’ve always been a very sexually curious girl; I became sexually active around age 13, started watching porn even earlier, and started touching myself even earlier than that!!! So, even though I’m just 19-years-old now, I would definitely have argued that even if I hadn’t personally done something myself, I had probably at least been exposed to the idea of it in some way, shape, or form.
Dancers perform during fetish fashion event in TokyoWell, fast forward to me entering the world of phone sex and I was smacked in the face with ideas and concepts I wouldn’t have ever dreamed up in my head. Shocking to me, the things that I, at the time, thought might be “taboo” were in fact considered to be “vanilla” in this new circle I was becoming immersed in. As call after call began pouring in, I quickly realized that there’s a whole big world out there of crazy shit happening I had no idea about, but that I would become increasingly fascinated with.

Before I get in too deep, for ME on a personal level, by age 18 (the age I started phone sex) I had had REAL LIFE sex with 5 different guys: the boy I lost my virginity to, my high-school boyfriend aka “first love,” the married, older man otherwise known as my “secret affair,” the 30-something boyfriend who I still can’t believe my parents let me leave the house with, and the really cute boy I sometimes hooked up with during summers away at my family’s annual vacation spot. By today’s teen standards I fell somewhere completely centered to the extremes of “prude” versus “slore” (slut+whore) and was perfectly comfortable with that placement.

In addition to number of partners, I’d not done anything out of the ordinary sexually. Most girls I knew were having sex by age 15 and a majority were doing anal by the time we graduated high school, so nothing too “taboo” happening over here other than that little married man mishap. Oops. 😉

With all of that said… my first few calls as a “PSO” were a little shocking and ranged from sexy, confusing, disturbing, and even more fucking confusing. Any given night I could go from hearing the sexiest fucking thing that made me so wet, resulting in having to play with myself to hearing the most deplorable thing I could ever imagine and wondering if I legit should be making a phone call to the police! Because of this, I really started delving deeper into trying to understand various fetishes, and before long I convinced myself that most men belonged in one of 2 categories: guys who want to be your “daddy” and guys who want to be forced to suck cock. Sometimes they start as one and very abruptly can become the other, and oftentimes I would find that there were additional “fetishes” that were the result of this basic categorization, but overall… I was quickly introduced to those two types of people and all their deepest, darkest, and most deviant of fantasies.

taboofetish5For instance – in my experience the “daddy” type usually love taboo role play involving “incest,” whether it’s a daughter type, step-daughter, son’s girlfriend, or anything closely related (no pun intended). There’s the “Sugar Daddy” who want to buy you things or put you through school or pay your bills and treat you like a little China doll and call you names like “princess” in exchange for some amazing arm candy they wouldn’t likely score without this financial arrangement. Other “daddies” engage in voyeurism and public masturbation, that can result in stalking, and a number of different forced sexual scenarios that, if happening in real life, would be terrifying, but when playing out with a few of these men while I’m safely protected by distance, can be admittedly hot (go on…. I dare you to judge me, then think about the kind of fucked up shit you are into! Hehe.).

The guys who love to suck dick though, are endlessly eye opening to me! From self proclaimed “sissies” to guys looking to be humiliated and dominated, these men really introduced me to the world of men who were just begging to be submissive; forcing me to evaluate any man who approached me in real life and secretly ask myself, “does this guy really like me or would he rather be sucking cock?” Yes, this could definitely fuck with a girl over time. Particularly a girl like me who, even though my ego wanted to believe I was “experienced,” was actually pretty sheltered in the world of sexual exploration of fetishes, particularly the “taboo” kind. I mean, there is absolutely nothing shocking about guys wanting to suck dick; I’ve had my fair share of gay friends, but when it’s a guy on his knees begging his “mistress” (wait, that’s me??? Lol) to allow him to suck my hypothetical boyfriend’s dick before his wife gets home with the kids…. Well, welcome to the secret deviant world of living out your taboo desires over the phone!

TabooFetish2One of my most memorable calls early on was with a guy only a few years older than me – maybe 22 or 23 – who wanted me to pretend I was his girlfriend who recently broke up with him. Me being ME, initially did the typical girly “awwwwwww!” offering my condolences, only to quickly realize that this scenario did not call for sympathy, but instead he wanted me to humiliate him. I was to tell him all the reasons I (playing his gf) am breaking up with him and how pathetic he is. All of this would happen as he “polished his gun.” I’d like to convince myself that this was some kind of euphemism for stroking his cock, but I don’t think so. After our call “finished” so to speak, he told me not to hang up and he proceeded to put me on hold. I then listened to him interacting like a completely normal human being with another person in his home. By the time I hung up the phone I was fairly certain he wasn’t going to murder anyone that day, but …. I’d be crazy to say that it didn’t strike a chord with me in some way that made me truly fascinated by the way our minds work in connection to sexual deviance and desires.

Over time I’ve learned there is FAR more to the sexual psyche than those previous categories I was so quick to stereotype. From guys who love to be teased and denied an orgasm altogether to the callers who literally want to be ignored or ridiculed as you go about whatever mundane task you happen to be doing at home. Then there’s the men who get off on forced intoxication. In other words, I will force you to take shot after shot after shot of liquor so you become so inebriated that you spend all your money on me. In the process of this, I ridicule him and find creative and unique ways of letting him know he’s less meaningful to me than the dirt on the bottom of my shoes. Oh, then there’s the guys who want to lick the dirt off the bottom of my shoes because, well…. That’s hot too, right? From stocking fetishes to spanking fetishes to the caller who would jerk off as I in painfully slow, intricate detail described to him what every single one of the teeth in my mouth looked like, I’ve come to find out over the course of the last year that just about anything you could conjure up in your mind…. there’s someone out there who will cum so fucking hard to that craziness!

TabooFetish1Learning about these fetishes and communicating about them, asking the callers questions so that I understand more, and playing out their fantasies for them is something I genuinely enjoy doing, even if the fetish itself is not necessarily my cup of tea. One of my favorite calls was a very long role play fantasy where the guy wanted to time-travel back in time so he could impregnate his mother with himself. I mean, who gets to piece together the outrageous details of such a scenario and get paid to do it, customer satisfaction practically guaranteed? I mean, if you cum…. I’ve done my job, right? 😉 A year into doing phone sex, it now takes a lot to shock me and I am surprisingly able to go through the motions with crazy fetishes and taboos I’ve never seen or heard. In fact, I fucking love when someone comes up with stories so unique that it literally makes me laugh out loud – not because I think the person is weird, but because I’m genuinely entertained by the level of whimsy, fantasy, creativity, and all around storytelling that some people can bring into their process of getting off.

For myself, I obviously like older men and I like the idea of being overpowered in the bedroom, tossed around and played with and feeling so desired that it comes close to the brink of feeling “used.” I love a good spanking every now and then, and I am very much into pushing the boundaries of what me and my guy are capable of getting away with in public, adding a little bit of exhibitionism to my fetish shelf that I didn’t quite know I had before. I’ve definitely gotten into the whole “fantasy role play world and enjoy dressing up in sexy little outfits, heels, and playful attire that will suit whatever “role” is being explored. Yet, there are many areas that still leave a bit of a question mark in my mind that I’m just not completely sold on yet. Forced intoxication, financial domination, sissy training, and cuckolding, to name a few.

findomFinancial domination in particular is interesting to me and I’d love to know more, but quite frankly most of the FinDom guys on NiteFlirt are fakers who don’t come through. Even though they are begging to have their wallets raped, they still think they can tell the girl what to do and have their orders be delivered on demand. To me, a fetish isn’t fun if you’re not going to commit to it. That doesn’t mean you really have to empty your wallet for me if this is just a fantasy as opposed to a lifestyle, but it does mean you don’t get to boss me around like you’re in control, when what you’re asking for and calling me for is to control you. So even though I offer these services to my callers, I’ve yet to talk to the right guy who has really come through and sold the idea to me. If you’re reading this and think you’re that guy…. TRY ME. Give me a call and if you’re willing to commit, trust me…. I can and will fucking bring it.

So, I’d love to hear what kind of fantasies and fetishes you find intriguing, either because you’re aroused by it or just fucking intrigued. Do you consider yourself “vanilla” or “taboo” and why? Either comment here or send me a message through NiteFlirt so I can learn more about your kinks and your curiosities! Maybe you’re not even sure what your particular sexual fetishes are? Check out some of my audio goodies and explore some naughty and erotic adventures with me, even if it’s outside the niche that normally gets you off!            


Call RyderDoll for phone sex on Niteflirt.com