Guide to the Virtual Girlfriend Experience

I was lucky enough this past week to have an amazing conversation with a fellow flirt from NiteFlirt! My friend, Sara (popularly known as SweetlySensual_Sara on NF), is the gorgeous, sensual voice behind the podcast, “Must Love Fetish.” Yours truly was her special guest this week! Sara interviewed me, and we had a very insightful and thought provoking conversation regarding the virtual girlfriend experience.

must love fetish podcast
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In an effort to expand upon a very fascinating chat between Sara and I, I’m dedicating this post to the elaboration of some of the interesting topics related to being a virtual girlfriend. My suggestion is to first listen to my guest appearance on “Must Love Fetish” if you haven’t done so already! If you decide to read this first, be sure to accompany it with the podcast as a follow up (you can listen for free on iTunes), so you can hear Sara and I speaking about the complexities, intricacies, and addiction that is the virtual girlfriend experience.

As a consumer in adult services, you’ve likely seen the term “girlfriend experience” or “GFE” advertised all over NiteFlirt and other adult forums. Perhaps you’ve been one of the lucky men to partake in a mutually beneficial girlfriend experience? Maybe you’ve been curious but reluctant to seek out a GFE service, not knowing what your expectations might be? Or, perhaps you have no fucking clue what having a virtual girlfriend would even mean? Well, here is your guide to all things “Virtual Girlfriend Experience.”

What is the Virtual Girlfriend Experience?

Very much like the name indicates, having a virtual girlfriend brings all the benefits of a real relationship: conversation, companionship, intimacy, sexual pleasure, and emotional support to name a few. Yet, ideally, having a virtual girlfriend leaves behind the many stresses that tend to arise with a “real life” girlfriend or wife: arguing, jealousy, nagging, control, demands, predictability and monotony.

The concept of the “Girlfriend Experience” arises from the world of escorting;however, a virtual girlfriend provides, essentially, the same experience but without the actual physical contact with that of sleeping with an escort. Yes, it’s still considered a transaction or exchange of goods – the reality is that when we work in the adult business that is at the core of all of our phone sex relationships. There is the provider and there is the client; however, the virtual girlfriend experience truly delivers so much more than an exchange of sexual pleasure for money. Dedicating your hard earned money and time to a virtual girlfriend pays off far more than it costs. If you find the right girl, the benefits are endless, and you will have earned not only a confidant but a true friend who is always in your corner. Your girlfriend experience will include having a woman who is always available to cheer you on during your achievements and successes and who is going to be there for you during obstacles and hardships.

Is the Virtual Girlfriend Experience for You?

A majority of my “virtual boyfriends” are men who are at a point in their lives where they might feel like they are no longer the priority in their real life partner’s world or have found that they are missing out on the most necessary intimate aspects of a relationship. If in your life you often feel lonely, ignored, under appreciated, unimportant, insecure, and in need of someone to talk to, then you are already a great candidate for finding a virtual girlfriend.

GFE isn’t just for the aforementioned men; perhaps you travel a lot or are often too preoccupied with work and friends to give what is necessary to an every day relationship. Maybe you find that you are often selfish in relationships and it’s just sometimes too much trouble to cater to the schedule, wishes, and expectations of women who just don’t understand what it is you need out of a girlfriend. It’s even possible that you’re perfectly happy in your current marriage or relationship, yet need a little spice on the side.

There’s no shame in wanting action and excitement so you can explore your sexuality. There’s also no shame in wanting to, as you continue to grow as a person, meet new people and have new experiences outside of your every day world of family and friends and work and mundane duties. All humans crave both emotional connection and sexual gratification; therefore, the virtual girlfriend experience is a no-strings-attached way to fulfill those desires without actually stepping out on your significant other or compromising your own needs. 

How to Find the Perfect Virtual Girlfriend

On the “Must Love Fetish” virtual girlfriend experience episode, I spoke about how I never set out to offer a girlfriend experience to callers. Becoming a professional “girlfriend” of sorts just happened naturally, because I grew to have genuine care for my callers and made real connections to men who kept wanting to come back for more. Over time, these phone relationships have grown into true connections, real attraction, and a mutually beneficial arrangement.

As a provider of phone sex, I most certainly know that every single man who dials my number is not going to be my “ideal” man. Sometimes the reality is that a phone sex call just doesn’t deliver the chemistry or connection or gratification that someone is looking for. Personalities might conflict, fetishes might work in opposition of what I, as a provider, am willing to offer, and any other number of scenarios might occur that make a caller and a phone sex girl NOT be a perfect match for each other. For instance, just like when going on a real date, sometimes you just don’t “click.” In regular phone sex and fantasy role play calls, these issues aren’t usually much of an issue at all. In fact, a caller might not ever even have the indication that our personalities aren’t jiving, because the purpose isn’t to get to know one another, the purpose is to get off. It’s my job to please YOU, the caller. If you’re paying for me to humiliate you because of your small penis or if you’re wanting me to “wallet rape” you or role play as your cum hungry wife, I can do all of these things whether it turns me on or not. You pay for our services; us girls deliver.

The virtual girlfriend experience though, is vastly different. There needs to be a real connection and mutual respect for one another on multiple levels. As much as I am here to cater to you and your needs, you also provide me with a gratifying sexual, emotional, and intimate experience. Being a phone whore can be faked; being a virtual girlfriend takes authenticity, truth, understanding, and most of all RESPECT.  For men browsing sexy listing after sexy listing of women offering a virtual girlfriend experience, it might be hard to determine who the right girl for you is. I’ve found that most of my virtual boyfriends didn’t start off wanting or seeking out a GFE; what happened was that they called me for a more traditional phone sex experience, but we hit it off.

Over time, we both wanted to know more about each other’s personalities and lives. We would discuss everything from our sexual desires to our ideal dates to what our favorite movies and books are or just sharing a funny story about something that happened to us that day.We began to have longer conversations that focus on real life opinions, observations, and experiences rather than just going through the motions of a sexual experience and hanging up the phone. This doesn’t mean, however, that many men don’t set out to find a virtual girlfriend rather than just a smoking hot phone fuck. It just takes a little bit more work on your behalf to find a woman who is going to be genuine with you rather than someone who is just going to play along as though it’s a fantasy. Again, let me be clear – “playing” at being your girlfriend is well within the realm of phone sex services; but, if you truly want to feel a true connection, it means you’ve got to engage in repeated calls and the entire conversation shouldn’t be completely one-sided. Sure, you’re paying for your calls, but as mentioned earlier, for real feelings to develop, you must do your part in sustaining the relationship and staying in the forefront of a woman’s mind.

If you’re testing the waters with finding a virtual girlfriend experience, you should be looking for a woman on the other end of the phone who is giving you her undivided attention. She should, over the course of a few phone calls, be able to remember details you’ve told her in the past without it feeling forced or faked. Your virtual girlfriend should follow up on things you’ve talked about in the past, such as travel plans or important events you may have mentioned in a past call. She should ask questions about your life, while also sharing experiences of her own. Your new virtual girlfriend should be able to laugh with you, talk with you about your interests (though she doesn’t need to be an expert in them), and know when it’s time to turn up the heat. When you’ve found a woman you look forward to talking to, someone you think about throughout the day and want to share thoughts, feelings, and just something that made you think of her with, then you’re making that transition from role playing to a developing a connection to a virtual girlfriend.

All of this sounds like a real relationship, right? So, what’s the benefit of having a virtual girlfriend rather than going out and finding a “real life” girlfriend to deliver these essential benefits or fill a void in your life? Well, the obvious is that on the phone you are less vulnerable because there is a level of distance that doesn’t call for traditional expectations like monogamy. You don’t need to rely on your physical appearance being what leads a woman to be interested; it’s your intelligence, personality, and who you are at your core that your virtual girlfriend will become attracted to.

A virtual girlfriend isn’t bringing you baggage or demanding expectations beyond what you choose to give her. The stress of a real relationship doesn’t and shouldn’t seep into your virtual world of happiness, companionship, and intimacy. A virtual girlfriend won’t make unreasonable demands for your time, she won’t stop you from hanging out with your friends, she won’t get jealous because you talked to some other woman, and she won’t make you feel stupid, insecure, or not good enough. You can get all those things from a real life girlfriend or wife, and your virtual girlfriend knows this!

Sex with a connection and deep intimacy is fucking incredible and above and beyond what any traditional phone sex call can provide. Getting off is great, obviously, but getting off with someone with whom you’ve built and established a mutually caring and genuine admiration and connection with can surpass some of the real life sex you’ve ever had. This isn’t to say, however, that journeying into the world of virtual relationships doesn’t allow room for real life situations to occur. It just means that for many men out there, finding a virtual girlfriend experience can fill any emptiness you’ve found to exist in your life. Us flirts are here to save you from a boring, predictable, lonely, and love-less life. Finding the right virtual girlfriend for you can make all the difference in your happiness. 

The Complexities of Providing the Virtual Girlfriend Experience

As the girl offering a girlfriend experience, the experience itself can be complex and emotional. When we’re providing phone sex, us flirts are well aware that the goal is to get you off. We know that once you cum, the call usually ends, and if we’re lucky enough to make it to your “favorites” we’ll hear from you again in a few days or weeks and have a hot phone fuck session all over again. However, when offering girlfriend experience, we open up to our callers (or “virtual boyfriends” as I like to say) on a much deeper level. These men see us as more than just a sultry and sweet voice with a dirty vocabulary on the other end of the line. You will see us as the real people we are. Us GFE flirts share true and meaningful experiences with you, and show ourselves to you on an intimate level that very few of our callers are lucky enough to ever see. It can be difficult for both parties to establish and maintain boundaries when this level of intimacy is involved.

During the “Must Love Fetish” podcast, Sara asks me if I’ve ever fallen in love with a caller. She also shares her own personal story of falling for a previous client of hers. Our conversation is authentic and demonstrates some of the insecurities and painful choices that might arise as a phone sex provider who has found herself with feelings for a man who in any other world is just a distant stranger on the other end of the line.

Us virtual girlfriends are not immune to truly falling for you. It’d be very difficult to speak to someone on the phone for hours at a time, sometimes several days a week and keep up a facade regarding who we are and how we feel. We are capable of falling in love with you, capable of having our hearts broken by you, and capable of insecurities that people tend to experience in real life relationships. As a result, we might build walls and create boundaries that, to you – the man paying for our services in the virtual girlfriend experience – don’t fully understand. We have reasons for not giving you our real phone numbers or meeting up for coffee or a fun weekend away, despite how much we want to go. We might hesitate in telling you we love you back after you’ve professed your feelings; not because we don’t feel it, but because of our own lack of “control” over the situation. Romantic feelings are a fragile thing and us girls would often prefer not to break down the virtual wall; this is often out of the need to protect ourselves, as well as you, from the pitfalls that can doom real relationships.

Need to Know More About Virtual Relationships?

To learn more about how I answer that “love” question and many more questions posed by Sara during our conversation, you’ll have to listen to the podcast in its entirety. I’d love to know my readers’ and callers’ opinions on the virtual girlfriend experience. Please leave a comment with your personal GFE history, curiosities, questions, and thoughts!

Finally, if you’re in search of something that feels like it’s been missing from your life that traditional phone sex calls haven’t been able to provide, next time you call your favorite flirt maybe frame your call differently; get to know her on a deeper level; ask questions or share stories and observations like you would on a real life date. Then, see if the two of you hit it off… you just might be lucky enough to be one of the men who find a truly one of a kind relationship with that flirt. This connection can bring your sex life to new levels of excitement. Thoughts of your times spent with your virtual girlfriend will make you wake up every single day feeling more alive, knowing that there is a woman out there who unconditionally has your back and your best interest in mind. For us flirts who offer a virtual girlfriend experience, we’ll be by the phone hoping that when the phone rings it’s you – the favorite caller, the man who gets us off every single time, the virtual boyfriend who is also giving us what we are missing in our own lives.  

virtual girlfriend experience
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Erotic Bedtime Stories

Imaginative Storytelling

I’ve always had an incredibly creative mind. My ability to, on the spot, come up with compelling and detailed scenarios is one of the strengths that has made me such a successful phone sex girl. From a very young age I loved to read, write, play dress up, and play “make believe.” Still, as a young woman I love creating tales for my callers to tantalize them and keep them coming back for more. My role play phone calls as well as my fantasy mp3 goodies have helped me to rise to the top of popular flirts on NiteFlirt. Putting myself into the role of a character can be fun and exciting, allowing me to experience levels of pleasure and eroticism that I otherwise might not experience.

To be clear, I am very much myself when a man calls my line on NiteFlirt. When I’m asked personal questions, I answer honestly about myself (within the boundaries that I’m willing to share). Some types of calls don’t require an external fantasy scenario; these are the callers that get the true version of myself. Then, there are the calls that request for a specific role to be acted out. I’m not playing a character 24/7 with my clientele – I am ME – Ryder – the real girl exploring her sexuality with horny men while managing to set aside a pretty nice saving account for when I’m out of college! However, one of the beauties of phone sex is that of being able to create role plays and play dress up. Only, unlike when I was a kid, this is a very much adult version of “make believe,” only suitable for those mature enough to play along.

It can be thrilling to take on characteristics that aren’t normally ones I possess. Playing around with a concept or character offered by a caller, and stepping up to the challenge to see what new ideas I can bring to their fantasy is incredibly rewarding. Having phone sex can be easy; however, to be GOOD at phone sex and offer callers individualized and original calls is much more challenging than just moaning and talking dirty.

Being good at phone sex role plays takes the willingness to let your imagination wander. A good storyteller allows his or her mind to travel and wander down unchartered or unexpected territory. Without a creative mind, men calling a woman on a phone sex line might experience predictable or sometimes repetitive calls, and let’s be honest – when you’re paying for phone fun and want to get off, who the fuck wants the same exact experience, character, and narrative every single time? OK, to be fair…. some of you definitely DO want that! However, as a caller I imagine you would want your flirt to do some improvisation, to keep you on your toes, and to make you excited for what new angle she’ll take with your fantasy or new way that she’ll approach the narrative in a future call.

I believe that the element of a strong imagination is why so many new flirts feel nerves, self-consciousness, or don’t last very long in adult entertainment. Storytelling isn’t for everyone; but, those of us who are good at it can offer incredible, one-of-a-kind role play experiences that will surpass the years your own imagination has explored your favorite fantasies. If you haven’t ran a fantasy by a good adult storyteller, it’s time for you to start your own search for a favorite girl to bring your fantasies to a whole new, outstandingly erotic and sensual level. 

Every Good Story Needs a Climax

The power that a good story holds can affect the listener both physically and emotionally. Just like the fairytale bedtime stories of my childhood, strong character development and an exciting narrative keep the listener invested and involved, on the edge of his seat waiting for the climactic point of the tale and the release that comes with it.

If you’ve yet to talk to me about my personal interests, reading is a big passion of mine. I’m almost always reading a book – usually some kind of mystery or suspense or young adult type novel, but I have a genuine appreciation for good writing and story development. I have always been the teacher’s pet of my English classes throughout my education, taking A.P. Literature classes that forced me to read classics that became some of my favorite books. I love how words can transcend a page, add a romanticism and connection to characters in stories to my own life, despite laying in bed alone with my Kindle in hand. 

I’m in no way going to claim to be an all-star writer, but I do believe that being an avid reader has made my storytelling come alive in my phone sex world. Knowing how to frame a scene, how to portray my character as a realistic, full personality who has complexities to her are important in role playing a caller’s fantasy.

Want me to be your domineering babysitter? A bratty spoiled socialite? A cute, innocent little virgin? Your cheating girlfriend? Your controlling boss? A naive stranger? 

In reality, I’m none of these things but I CAN be all of these things. Based on my own personal experiences as a young woman, an understanding of the complexities of the human personality, the ability to utilize vocabulary and voice delivery that suits your tale, and just simply the knowledge that I am in control of a story and my imagination is the limit. Those are the elements that drive you over the edge, climbing up that peak to the climactic point of the story where you reach that highest point of excitement. It is there at the climax that allows the pay off of being fully invested mentally and physically; you explode and feel the euphoria of that release settle.  

When a man chooses to call me I oftentimes don’t know what particular fantasy he may suggest or want to explore. It’s my job to take a little bit of information from him, and take the reigns. I move forward into setting up a world where I’m providing a sensual, erotic, and hypnotizing experience, a bedtime story of sorts that transcends the listener to a world outside of reality. The character, situation, and experiences come alive. When I, in detail, lay there with a man on a call, with my eyes closed, imagining every aspect of the story I improvise, we are both displaced to this other exciting world. We are both taken outside of ourselves where the role play can feel so real.

I hope that when a fantasy role play call with me ends, you, as the caller, feel like you experienced an escape, like a great book or story can provide. As I tailor a role play to your tastes and fetishes, you’ll explore an exhilarating ride that will, before bedtime, calm you down and serve a satisfying relief. Yet, like any good addicting story or storyteller, I’ve created an anticipation, curiosity, and intrigue as to what new, dirty, sexy stories can come from my naughty and deviant mind during our next call.

Want to hear me read this latest blog post on “Erotic Bedtime Stories”? Download the audio version HERE.

erotic bedtime stories
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Wrist Icicles and Dick Bicycles: Ryder’s Favorite Things

Whether you’re familiar with these sexual slang terms or not, you’ve undoubtedly heard the lyric “wrist icicle, ride dick bicycle” if you listen to popular radio. Regardless of how you feel about the music of Ariana Grande and Nicki Minaj, they managed to make these sex terms and actions into common expectation and practice in young adult social circles of today.

Wrist Icicle

wrist icicle dick bicycleWrist Icicles are, to use amore familiar reference, an updated version of a “pearl necklace,” but instead a “pearl bracelet” so to speak. Instead of having cum trickle around your neck to mimic that of a necklace (don’t worry, us girls still like that too!) it’s the act of having your wrist covered with cum after a hot hand job ends. The cum will spill out over the girl’s hand and wrist. Anyone who thinks he doesn’t like hand jobs will change his mind after giving his woman a proper wrist icicle. I dare you not to fall in love.

So, what exactly is so exciting about a hand job when you can just get a blow job or fuck a girl instead? If you don’t know, then you obviously haven’t had a chance to spend some time with me on the phone to walk you through a role play of exactly how I would stroke your cock. While it can’t be argued that the feeling is amazing for a guy to be inside the warm, soft pussy of a girl or to bury his cock deep into a girl’s wet mouth and see her choke on it. Hand jobs, however, provide a very different, but equally visually exciting sensation.

wrist icicle dick bicycle

Both you and the woman stroking you are able to take in every detail about how hard your cock is as it swells in the girl’s hand, how sticky and wet it becomes after leaking out some of that pre-cum, and most deliciously, just how far or high you can shoot your creamy load once youcum. An added bonus is an extra naughty girl like me doing all the work who gets super into what she’s doing. For example, I don’t just pump up and down and wait for a guy to shoot his load. Not only will I change up technique by switching from slow and seductive to fast and filthy, but I’ll also talk dirty to you while sliding your cock up and down the palm of my hand.

If you’ve ever spoken to me, you know that the nastiest things will shockingly come out of my sweet little mouth. Just imagine me talking you through the actions of every stroke of my hand, every time my fingers massage your pre-cum into your thick head, and every time I squeeze at the base of your cock and tell you how hot it’s making me to see your dick growing into the big, rock hard, and most beautiful cock I’ve seen. I’m totally into cock worship, and a hand job is the perfect opportunity to service a cock that deserves some love, care, affection, and release.

After that release, when your cock spurts your thick and yummy load into the air, falling down over the outside of my hand and trickling to my wrist, you’ll have successfully given me that beautiful wrist icicle that I strive for. Lucky for us both, that’s not the end of it. I love showing you how good it tastes, by letting you watch me lick up every drop from my wrist and hand, while you recover and work toward getting hard again for me to practice my next favorite sex act on you!

Dick Bicycle

wrist icicle dick bicycleWhen a girl tells her friends about having a dick bicycle the night before, it means that she’s so fucking sore that she can hardly walk as a result of riding a guy’s dick all night long as though it were a bicycle. Ariana Grande’s song “Side to Side” is about just this; the lyrics “I’ve been here all night, I’ve been here all day, and boy you got me walkin side to side” tells listeners she’s officially and successfully broken away from her Nickelodeon tween days, you know… since she’s released a song simply about riding dick so fucking good. If your daughters, or nieces, or whomever are a fan of that song or of Ariana, you better watch out: that girl has officially become curious about getting dick so hard and deep that it will break her.

I’ve always been addicted to being on top during sex. I know this is usually the time during a phone call that guys will ask me, “is this why you call yourself Ryder?” Um, no. My name actually IS Ryder (and no, my last name is NOT “Doll”). Trust me, any comment you can make about me being a good little “cock Ryder/Rider” has already been made to me since my middle school years, so please spare me the comparison! However, I’m the first to admit that it hasn’t hurt me in terms of business to have a name that immediately associates me to an incredibly hot and erotic sexual position. Maybe my name is what got me predisposed to this being my favorite position? If so, please don’t tell my mommy or daddy that they’re responsible for that particular aspect of my personality (*wink*).

In all serious though, what could be hotter for a man than having a sexy, young, tight girl like me on his dick all night long, riding his cock like I’m riding in the goddamn Tour de France? I love to drive a guy completely crazy, but also have my passion be met with his passion. So while I’m riding that dick all night and day, he’s working just as hard to thrust up into me, guide my body up his shaft and slam me down hard, forcing all that length and thickness deep inside my tight little wet hole. I want to leave your bed (or wherever it is you were lucky enough to fuck me)completely disheveled, totally sore between my legs, and aching from being fucked so hard that I can’t walk straight.

wrist icicle dick bicycle

What’s Your Favorite?

Now that I’ve shared a couple of the latest things I love to do, both in my real sex life and on the phone through NiteFlirt, what are some of your favorites? If you had to choose between giving me a slippery, wet, and thick stringy load on my wrist then watch me lick it off OR having me bouncing up and down on your shaft all night, forcing me to explain to my girlfriends how you got me walking side to side the next day, which would you choose?

wrist icicle dick bicycleThere’s only one right answer as far as I’m concerned: why choose when you can have both!

Now that I’m completely wet between my legs and your cock is bursting out of your pants (that is, if your pants are even still on), pick up the phone and call my listing on NiteFlirt. If you thought reading this blog was hot, you will lose your fucking mind when you hear what I’m capable of doing to you over the phone. If I’m not currently available for a call, checkout my “Cock Worship” audio to edge you and make you explode.

Where did the inspiration from this blog come from? Watch the UNBELIEVABLY SEXY video by Ariana Grande feat. Nicki Minaj for the song “Side to Side.” Just do me ONE favor? Don’t blow your load before you get the chance to call me! hehe.

Anal Sex Adventures

Anal sex is in, and to be blunt – most guys want to fuck a girl in her ass at some point in his life!

It’s the hard (pun intended) truth. It can become a pressure between partners when one person definitively wants to try anal sex and one doesn’t even have anal sex on their sexy-time radar. The truth though, is that anal sex and ass play in general can be some of the most intense and enjoyable sexual experiences when done properly.

When it comes to anal sex, some of us girls are success stories with positive first experiences. Other girls, however, have horror stories or fears that make us never want a guy going back there under any circumstance. Some of us lucky ones were converted, only to become addicted to the pleasure of ass play and anal sex, with the hope of introducing it to new partners of our own.

Is Anal Sex “Vanilla” or “Taboo”?

Depending on who you ask, anal sex and ass play can get shockingly different reactions. Of my group of best friends, only two of us girls admit to enjoying anal sex and three have tried it but say it’s not for them. The remaining three of the eight of us have an absolute hell-to-the-no response any time the topic comes up.

I became sexually active at a young age. It was myAnal Sex freshman year in high school when my then boyfriend first mentioned the prospect of anal sex to me. To generations older than my own, the idea of sex at that age, not to mention anal sex, might already be surprising. Yet, those people must remember, my generation is hyper-sexualized. I mean, all teens are obsessed with sex and have raging hormones, regardless of what decade their adolescence took place in. However, my generation is one groomed off of Internet porn and other forms of entertainment that pushes sexual limits. Things that might have been taboo to our parents’ generation has become matter-of-fact or even “vanilla” to us.

Regardless of age or gender, though, sexual fetishes are subjective. What’s the norm and expected sexual play to one person might be deviant and offensive to another. It’s anal sex, though, that is one of those fetishes that falls within the mainstream that is still met with shock and whispers when discussed in social circles.

Anal SexI’ve known girls who claimed to give blow jobs before they ever had their first kiss. I’ve known other girls who had anal sex because they didn’t consider that as giving up their virginity (eye roll). Other girls of course were harassed into it by boyfriends, while some had a very clear “no enter” policy on ass play of any kind. Sex acts like oral sex, vaginal sex, and YES, even anal sex are the norms for most average teens in a world where SnapChat and secret texting apps that our parents don’t know about are the main form of communication among friends and classmates.

Once, during my sophomore year of high school, a boy from one of my classes who might never have had the nerve to speak to me in school had all the courage in the world talking over direct message. Alone in his room one night, he got horny; having seen some pictures I added to Instagram, his self control was tested and he became so confident that he felt the need to text me. He wrote something to the effect of, “I want you to wrap those sexy lips around my cock so bad.” As a young woman, I feel flattered by this compliment, while at the same time questioning the nerve to be so bold to a girl he’d never had a real conversation with in person.

As you can imagine, if propositions like this come from mere acquaintances, when it comes to someone you’re already sexually active with, the limits are tested and pushed constantly. From requests of naughty SnapChats to acting out fantasies your boyfriend or friend saw in a porn the night before, this tends to be how many girls my age come around to trying anal sex for the first time. Just like “regular” sex, once anal sex is practiced within your circle of friends, it becomes more normalized, less taboo, and just another way to switch things up in the bedroom (or in the car or wherever the hell you can get it in before you have to be home for dinner). 

Ease Into Anal Sex with Ass Play

Anal SexFrom early on in my sexual experiences I enjoyed having a guy lick me all over, which includes finding his tongue exploring around my tight little asshole. Feeling a finger press against that spot as I got my pussy licked, would make me quiver all over. Eventually, having that very first finger start to press against that tightness, I was introduced to a world that made my orgasms more intense and my sexual appetite even more exaggerated than it already was. I have amazing memories back to my early sexual experiences when my boyfriend would go down on me literally every single day after school. He’d always in some way explore my perfect little tight asshole, telling me he dreams about the day that I finally let him fuck me there.

Due to his desire to take things to the next level, my boyfriend showed me an anal sex video of a girl hardcore fucked in the ass. In his own misguided youth, he chose a video that was particularly rough and hard and turned me OFF rather than ON to the whole idea of it. I still wanted ass play with his tongue and finger, but gave a strong “no” on anything more. One day he even “accidentally” slipped back there as he was fucking me, and the excruciating pain made me scream and cry and tell him that the whole idea of him, me, and anal sex just isn’t going to happen.

Fast forward a couple of years, after my aforementioned anal-dreaming boyfriend and I broke up. I got into a relationship with a man who was much older than me and very married (oops). He loved my youth, energy, and sexual appetite. I loved his experience, gentleness, and sexually explorative nature. He told me there wasn’t anything he wouldn’t want to do with me, and this naturally opened the topic of anal sex.Anal Sex

He told me he’d done it before, but never with his wife. She never wanted to try it and once she said she didn’t have that interest, anal sex and ass play of any kind was shut down completely. Hearing him talk about his experience of fucking girls in the ass in his past and loving it, but being cut off from ever having the chance to experience that again made me think about my own sexual choices.

I never wanted nor do I ever want to be that woman who says “never.” I knew I didn’t want to go that far with my ex-boyfriend and do anal a couple years prior, but now… I was intrigued. I had this experienced, sexy, mature older man who knew what he was doing. Furthermore, the extent to which he would get hard when we would talk about it would turn me on so fucking much.

So one brave night, I took solace in the distance of not being with him at the time and texted him a selfie of me with my ass up in the air behind me. The accompanying message read, “I want you to fuck me so bad, and I want you to put it in my ass next time.” So the following Friday after school, when my parents thought I was going to my best friend’s house and staying the night, I showed up at the hotel to meet up with him. I was nervous and excited. He came equipped with lube and was already hard, but fully expecting me to tell him to stop as soon as he got started. He took his time with me. He ate me out, warmed my little ass up by licking it and fingering it, and telling me how fucking hot I am and he can’t wait to feel that tight butt wrapped around his cock.

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I’ll never forget the feeling of the head of his cock pressing against my ass for the first time. His cock was so wet, and it took a really long time for him to even be able to fit the head inside of me, which was the most painful part. He was patient, gentle, and sweet. He constantly asked me if I was okay and wanted more. I could only keep expressing a breathy “yes” as he tried to fit it in. Eventually, he got the head in, and started to slowly push in further, never being rough or getting too carried away.

Anal SexIf I could ever give a man advice about turning a girl on to anal sex, it would be to use this patient and gentle approach. The “oops, I slipped” and rough anal sex porn approach of my previous boyfriend got him nowhere with my ass at that time. However, this sensual, slow, and conscientious technique not only turned me on to anal sex, but eventually got me begging for him to fuck me in my ass nearly every time we would hook up after that.

Like most things, this affair came to an end. He’s still with his wife, but it makes me smile every time I think about being able to make his teen anal sex fantasies come true. It makes me smile even more, though, that he turned me on to something that I otherwise would have potentially cut myself off from trying simply because it was, with my ex-boyfriend, the wrong person at the wrong time.

Anal Sex

Guy’s who call me on NiteFlirt for phone sex fun know that I’m an “anything goes” phone-fuck teen who loves it in my mouth, my pussy, and my ass. I like it slow and sensual and I like it hard and wild. Anal sex is always on the menu for my insanely sexy NiteFlirt boyfriends, but when it comes to real life I’ve only given my ass up to one other guy after my first anal sex partner.

The one other person was that ex-boyfriend who turned me off to it in the first place. For a very brief 3-month period, we got back together our last year of high school, and I never told him at the time that I had anal with someone else before him. I did, however, walk him through the slower, more sensual approach and it was amazing. It confirmed, if nothing else, that it wasn’t just a fluke; I’m a fan of anal sex! Things not long after got contentious between my boyfriend and I again. One day, in a cruel moment of too much honesty, I admitted to him that he was NOT the first guy to fuck me in my ass. Part of me took pleasure in this due to some of the ways he had previously treated me. However, there was that little part of me that felt guilty since he and I had so many other “firsts” together throughout our relationship.

I’m still waiting though, for that next guy in REAL LIFE who is going to get my ass. I love anal play and anal sex and can’t wait to meet another partner who goes above and beyond to worship my hot ass, do everything in his power to make it feel good, and who will cum harder than ever when he knows he’s in an elite club of guys I’d ever let slide into my ass and spread me open in such an intimate and exhilarating way. Until then though, where are my anal sex phone sex partners? I am craving a good anal fuck right now!
Call RyderDoll for phone sex on Niteflirt.com

Make America Sexy Again

AppleSexyAs a young woman of the millennial, digital age generation I know that by nature I tend to have a different outlook on a lot of life situations than probably many of the men I speak to on a regular basis. I’m of the generation who was practically born with an iPhone in our hands and if it wasn’t for the fact that my brother is a bona fide hipster, I wouldn’t have any fucking clue what people meant when they say things like “I have that album on vinyl” or “I’ll make you a mixed tape.” From politics, to pop culture, to social media, technology, fashion, and more, chances are strong that you and I would have some distinction between our perspectives simply on our age-gap alone, if not other factors. However, there is one unifying topic and universal language that joins us together: sex.

When I first became a Phone Sex Operator/Provider/Seductress/Mistress or other sexy title of your choosing, I’d have been hard pressed to consider myself part of the “adult industry.” I mean, I’m a normal girl, living in my parents’ house anGoodTimeSexyd just trying to save up some money for when I get to college, this is a temporary thing and short-lived, not something to make a career out of or to feel like I’ve joined the ranks of “real” adult performers like strippers, escorts, or porn stars. I never had those feelings in a judgmental way, but certainly in a separation kind of way. A “what I do” compared to “what they do” kind of way, which subconsciously, I’m now aware is judgmental when faced with that distinction as it’s typed out in front of me. From the point of view that “I just do phone sex,” I couldn’t possibly consider myself in the same ranks as women literally spending their nights in the laps of men at strip clubs, pay-by-the-hour motel rooms, or at The Bunny Ranch.

Having now been in the business of getting men off for money for a little over a year now, my perspectives have most certainly changed. As I look around me in the real world (i.e. the world outside of the dark, isolated, secret corners of the world with whom I’m connected through the phone late at night), I come to find to a frightening extent just how judgmental, conservative, and uptight our country, if not world, is about sex, sexuality, and sex workers. This comes to mind for a few reasons. One of which is a bill that’s up for vote in California affecting the adult film industry (Hey Cali guys – vote NO on Prop60 – read more here) another being the conservative push for restrictions on pornography, labeling it as some kind of disease that’s infesting our American society, and the third reason being my own personal encounters with a very judgmental person who showed me first hand that maturity and understanding do not, in fact, come with age and experience, as you’re often taught.

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Many of my guys who read my blog probably remember a time when you watched porn on VHS tapes or back rooms of video stores. You might remember when pornography started to become THE reason to get an Internet connection or when at a certain time of night late night cable would show soft-core porn (side note: they still do; this wasn’t just something happening in your glory days. hehe). For you, sex and masturbation was taboo and not often talked about openly- even the vanilla kind, so I can understand the frustration, humiliation, and shame that comes along with far more taboo fetishes you’d never let your colleagues, friends, family or even your best friend or significant other know about.

For me and my generation, however, we were raised in a digital age where any piece of information (sexual or otherwise) was a keyboard click away. I remember having dusty, old, rarely used dictionaries and encyclopedias in my classrooms that went unused. Those items became obsolete to desktops, tablets, and our own personal phones to seek out information. I grew up with a Mac in my bedroom, and as society would see it, I was an adolescent always one possible second away from the ultra scary world of corruption, abduction, and perversity.

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But to me, this access to information was just that… information. An education in something no one was willingly to openly talk about where the questions I had about my body, my fantasies, my internal thoughts and feelings weren’t hushed or turned away.  I was able to turn to the resources that let me realize that I wasn’t alone in these early adolescent desires. What was happening to my body and to my mind wasn’t something to be self-conscious or ashamed of, as people would have it. Instead, I found solace in the fact that women could be empowered, in control, and find pleasure in their body and in fulfilling their needs.

Thanks to those dirty, dark corners of the Internet and Internet porn, I grew to feel more open about my control over my body. It introduced conversations between my friends and I about sex that we otherwise might have never discussed, answering our cuSexyGirlsriosities and helping us explore what it meant to learn about our own bodies through feeling sensations of excitement, touching ourselves, and understanding the way that one day we will need men to touch us in order to bring us pleasure. For my friends and I we are looked at by older adults as being horny, slutty, degenerates who aren’t going to make anything of ourselves as a result of our over sexed and undisciplined lifestyles. It’s easy to blame the Internet, porn, movies, pop culture, etc. However, the way I see it is that we are no different from any other generation; we simply have the benefit of not having to hide who we are, what we like, and how we choose to act on those desires. I don’t believe we’re having sex any earlier than ever before; I just believe that more people are paying attention because of the exposure and unapologetic attitude of myself and my peers.

I’m not naive. I know there is a dark world out there and I completely know that my own perspective of pornography comes from the comforts of my suburban, middle-upper class bedroom as I took breaks from studying for my next AP exam or as I excitedly sought new, exciting ways to pleasure my boyfriend the next time we hooked up. I understand that there are predators, traffickers, and monsters out there. I, however, don’t believe it’s the adult industry, but rather the shame and degradation that comes along with the judgment toward sex, that perpetuates those issues (among other things that I won’t get into). Adult services, be it pornography, strip clubs, cam shows, or phone sex, are for entertainment. The purpose is to excite, release, move on, repeat. Anyone taking it as any more or less than that, as some kind of deep seeded stain on our society, needs to look into themselves about what they are truly trying to hide, because I find it is almost always the people who preach the loudest against something who tend to be the most guilty at the end of it all.

AmericanPantiesSexyAmerica is an amazing country that a majority of us lucky enough to be living here most certainly are aware of. We have the ability to freely speak our minds, debate issues, protest opposition, and so much more. However, in some ways our country wants to revert back to a puritanism of sorts, where sex is for procreation and not pleasure, where people aren’t supposed to live open, authentic lifestyles if it makes some other person or group uncomfortable, and where some government officials and groups want to place restrictions on the type of content, ideas, and images we are exposed to. We are living in a time when a small group of people in the government are telling women their jobs are putting them in danger and harmful to their health, safety, and to the impressions made on society; these same people though, are not willing to listen to the women working directly in the sex industry, who are saying “No- YOU do not know my life, my job, or the effect any of it has on me OR the world.” A majority of the women in the sex industry are empowered through their work; they do not need a law to tell them to “wear condoms or else,” when it’s riddled with language that could begin the downward spiral of the pornography industry in the state responsible for its primary production.

Many people might look at me and think “I can’t believe Ryder is doing THAT.” Yet, in that one simple judgment they fail to see that I’m not “just” a sex worker. I am smart, funny, clever, sarcastic, stubborn. I’m a daughter, sister, friend, lover. I’m a student and I’m a Phone Sex Operator. Most of all, I am someone who knows that people are at their happiest when they are getting laid and when they are getting off. I believe the adult industry is at its best with women at the helm of their own careers making their own business choices that are best for themselves. We are at our best when we are able to create content that allows men and women to have moments that allow us to feel true to ourselves and our desires.

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I already think America’s pretty great; but, I do think it could be a whole lot sexier as soon as we take the shame out of pleasure, take the stigma out of adult content, and just get it in like we need to- whether in real life, on the phone, digitally, or just in our imaginations. My hope is that older generations than mine look upon people my age with some envy that we can be so open and true to ourselves without as much judgment. In turn though, my other hope would be that those who are passing judgment on sexual promiscuity, the availability of pornography, and servicesAmericanFlagSexy that cater to adult clients will look within their own thoughts to identify hypocrisy where it exists. At the end of this all, let’s just all work harder to make America sexier! Celebrate your sexuality and your fetishes!. Explore curiosities and don’t be ashamed to make requests to sexual partners and have open discussions with  friends whom you fear might pass judgment. In the end, you have one life… Are you going to live it making excuses based on what others might think, or are you going to be your own freaky self and support the industry that brings to life every facet of your fantasies in vivid, exotic, and fucking incredible ways?

 Call RyderDoll for phone sex on Niteflirt.com

Ryder’s Red Hot, Sexy Summer

Have you been having a sexy summer? I have!

I’m well aware that I’ve been onsexy summer a serious hiatus with my blog writing this summer. Blame my sexy summer days by the beach and pool with friends, blame my incredible vacation to Italy that put me in a “disconnected from the world” state of mind, or blame yourselves – my many phone sex partners who keep me up so late at night, exhausting me from anything else in the world to the point where my mind is filled with sleep, fogginess, and just a constant hunger to cum rather than writing about it 😉

 

My Sexy Summer on Twitter

If you are wondering what I’ve been up to all summer now is as good a time as any to follow me on Twitter, where I’ve been very active lately! My handle is @FlirtRyderDoll – and while I know that many of you don’t want to mix RL with PSL (Real Life with Phone Sex Life, that is) there’s no reason you can’t create a “Phone Sex” or “NiteFlirt” related Twitter account to follow me and your other favorite flirts. You’ll benefit from getting to know me on a much more intimate level, feeling like you’re not only in my head since you know what I’m thinking but also to feel like you’re just an everyday part of my life due to ongoing communication any time of day or night. Also, you’ll get immediate updates and when I am signed on and off of NiteFlirt… and if you’re in dire need of me, you can tweet me and it instantly sends a notification to my phone. Much better than relying on NiteFlirt mail that I might not see until hours after you’ve sent it.Tempted yet? Create an account and follow me @FlirtRyderDoll!

 

My Sexy Summer on NiteFlirt

I’ve also updated my Goodies offerings with several new itemsexy summers throughout the course of this sexy summer. I’ve got everything from JOI (Jerk Off Instruction) to Fantasy Role Plays to extreme filthy talk to a 60 minute very intimate and personal Q & A session with yours trulyIf you have not checked these out yet, make sure you do. Use them as an escape from your daily life and use me and my voice as the ultimate form of Viagra that will keep you not only ROCK hard, but cumming non-stop like never before.

Jerk Off Instructions - Sensual Bedtime Release Jerk Off Instructions - Midday Quickie Fantasy Roleplay Collection - The Tourist's Temptation Fantasy Roleplay Collection - Block Party Blackout Fantasy Roleplay Collection - Irresisting Arrest Fantasy Roleplay Collection - Mile High Girl

Dirty Doll Series 1 Dirty Doll Series 2 Dirty Doll Series 3 fantasy-roleplay-collection-deviant-homewrecking-babysitter-1 fantasy-roleplay-collection-deviant-homewrecking-babysitter-2 fantasy-roleplay-collection-deviant-homewrecking-babysitter-3

My Sexy Summer in Italy

romeAside from my shameless self-promotions (#sorrynotsorry) my summer has been absolutely amazing. I took a 2-week vacation to Italy, where I travelled to 4 different regions on what was my first ever “solo” vacation. I was with one of my best friends and college roomie, but by “solo” I mean without my parents or without my school. My previous 2 trips to Europe were high school trips, to Barcelona and to London, and several years ago my family went overseas on a two week adventure to Ireland and Northern Ireland. Italy was my first time abroad as an adult, and wow did I make the most of it! I travelled to Rome, Florence, the Cinque Terre, and Venice & Verona and saw the most amazingly incredible sites and experienced the best that food, lifestyle, and culture had to offer.

I’m very fortunate to have such a prosperous job for a 19-year-old girl davidthat I was not only able to make this trip happen, but that I was able to live like a fucking baller for the entire 2 weeks I was there. I mean, since I’ve been home I’ve put myself on financial lock-down in order to save money for when I go back to school, but while there, I saw everything and anything my heart desired, I drank wine with every meal (hello, 18yo drinking age!), I soaked in the mediterranean sun and beaches, I flirted and enjoyed excursions with men who didn’t even speak English, and I spoiled myself rotten. I couldn’t be happier and my friend and I are already brainstorming ideas of where to travel next summer. Anyone have suggestions?

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Looking Forward to a Sexy Fall

As mansexy summery of you can probably agree, summer has soared past … I don’t know what happened to July and can’t believe that 3-weeks from now I’ll be packing my bags again and heading back to Boston for my sophomore year of school. I’ve been asked by a lot of guys lately what they can do for me, so if you’re feeling generous and want to contribute to “Ryder’s Back-to-School” fund, you can always send me a tribute or shop off my Amazon List to surprise me with some goodies for when I head back to a busy, busy year. Maybe instead you want to fund my back-to-school wardrobe? You can always tribute me on NiteFlirt or send specific store gift cards to my email address at RyderDoll1123@gmail.com. Anything and everything you guys do for me, I’m continuously grateful for! 

 

Aside from this update, I’m working on some ideas for another blog post in the coming days or hours, so make sure to check back and as always, don’t forget to give me a call soon so you can have some dirty talk and a naughty fuck with your favorite little flirt!


Call RyderDoll for phone sex on Niteflirt.com

Daddy’s Girl

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Yes, I need to address the super taboo, “off-limits,” word that brings with it a predetermined understanding of the dynamics of a relationship. I imagine the word “daddy” has been a part of bedroom play for decades, but for me personally, up until the last year “daddy” to me was only used in reference to my ACTUAL father whenever I really needed to borrow money, have a curfew extension, or lay on a guilt trip of some kind. Like every “daddy’s girl,” I mastered the art of the pouty lips and whiney voice very early in life. As the father of three adorable daughters (and one relatively handsome son) my dad has been put through the ringer when it comes to being wrapped around our pretty little fingers.

DaddysGirl6Nowadays the term “daddy” has brought on a highly sexual connotation for me, thanks to so many amazing callers on NiteFlirt. I often have callers reluctantly slip the “D” word into conversations and calls, worried that I’m going to cry “TOS violation” and disconnect immediately. Other guys go for it right away, introducing themselves as “Daddy” either when I ask for a name or prior to my even answering the phone through their daddy-inspired username. As a young woman who has a very healthy relationship with her real dad, this sexual nickname doesn’t offend me at all. I completely understand why NiteFlirt and other adult websites might want to discourage the use of the term, for fear that it instigates an incestuous relationship between blood relatives or those living under the same roof. Also, being that the term “daddy” clearly insinuates a much older man and a younger girl, I am sure they are fearful of any association to underage-play. I respect that and am not promoting those particular fantasies, despite the fact that they do indeed come up every so often. My perspective on this topic addresses the use of “daddy” outside of these previously mentioned circumstances.

I, like many other girls must confess that, from time-to-time, I’ve gotten caught up in the daddy role-play fantasy of many of my callers. Especially being a young woman who is just naturally attracted to and drawn to older, sophisticated, established men, I can’t help but get a little wet between my legs every time a guy introduces himself into the mysterious “daddy” role. Aside from the aforementioned TABOO concepts, there’s a lot of non-taboo ways to play with the daddy role. One way, obviously, is through the arrangement of a “Sugar Daddy” and “Sugar Baby,” while the other is simply just a mutual understanding that in the bedroom, “Daddy” is in charge; therefore, as the naughty little girl, I must comply with his wishes. This is a far tamer approach to a master and slave dynamic that allows partners to dip their toes into the figurative waters that represent power, domination, and control.

There is something so fucking hot about this role-play to me; I not only look forward to receiving these calls, but the role-play will almost always get ME off as well. There is some criteria that I have, though, since I couldn’t possibly be fingering myself and rubbing my clit every single time a guy wants me to call him “daddy.”  For instance, the circumstance would need to be such that the caller and I have good chemistry. Also, we’dDaddysGirl3 both need to have a mutual understanding of our roles. Furthermore, the guy on the other end of the line must be able to match my ability to get into the role, having a way with his words that convinces me he’s my authority figure who is to be respected. I live for those moments when I have to ask “daddy” for permission, when I need to inquire how to best make him proud, and when I have been naughty and need to be punished. I’ve always naturally, in my real sexual life and fantasies, been drawn to the submissive role, so a role-play that heightens this concept but doesn’t take it quite as far as being a “slave” really excites me. Being “daddy’s girl” means I get to be myself in terms of my real personality, age, and sexual interests. I get to be with an older man who truly loves girls my age, I get to do and say the things that turn me on, and I get to drive a guy crazy with my authentic enthusiasm.

Although I don’t consider myself a true “Sugar Baby,” I also think the concept of a “Sugar Daddy” can be hot in role-plays as well as in real life. As I said earlier, I’m extremely attracted to men who are successful and distinguished. He can be married or single, have a family or be child-less, possibly have the perfect personal life and professional life that most men dream of, or feel that his current situation is lackluster and uninspiring. Whatever the man brings to the table, I always love the entire scenario of me being the tempting, alluring, young woman drawing his attentions elsewhere. A man who is at a point in his life where he has it all, yet, for whatever reason, is longing for something in his life that inspires him to not be compliant in the mundane or predictable, will benefit greatly from a relationship with a girl in her late teens to early twenties.

By providing financial benefits to the DaddysGirl8girl, the man, in turn, will benefit not only sexually but mentally, spiritually, and in so many ways that help him to feed off of the adventure, the spontaneity, and the positive energy that comes along with a young woman on the brink of discovering her place in the world. For the young woman, she finds not only financial stability in a time when she would otherwise be living off of ramen noodles and shopping at B-level stores, she gets a taste of what the future of her life might have to offer if she, too, stays motivated by her career and the potential to begin that professional life debt-free. A confident, successful, and affluent man can provide opportunities, inspiration, sexual satisfaction, and personal growth on a level that wouldn’t be gained even slightly by dating college boys.

When it comes to real-life, over fantasy role-play, what I’m not into, however, is being a “trophy girl.” I don’t want a “daddy,” be it of the “sugar” variety or any man playing that authoritative role, who would be content with me being arm candy and nothing else. If a guy is looking for an individual seeking guidance, a girl who can provide thought-provoking conversations and challenge him at times, and a young woman who has self-respect, poise, and aspirations, then I’d be the perfect “baby girl” for him to reign his sugar down upon. If the man in question is simply in search of a perfect little fuck-toy who will be silent, submissive, stupid, and stunning all at once, I’m only willing to humor him with phone-time role-play when he calls my line.

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Sometimes “daddy” play is purely for the gratification of getting off with a great goddamn orgasm in the heat of the moment. Other times the scenario might be considered in the long-term arrangement between two individuals mutually benefiting from a steamy and prosperous encounter. Regardless of the set-up, the whole concept of being “daddy’s girl” in the bedroom is one that I am beginning to experiment with and very willing to further explore both on NiteFlirt and throughout these years of my young life as a college girl.

What do you guys think? Is “daddy” role-play hot or is it going too far? Do you think a lot of girls share my excitement over this roleplay? Does the idea of having a “Sugar Baby” get your cock hard, or does it make you feel taken advantage of and used?

I’d love to know your thoughts on this, and all my blog topics, either through the comments here, or through messaging me privately or calling me on NiteFlirt!

Call RyderDoll for phone sex on Niteflirt.com